Saturday, October 1, 2022

Back Again: Lost & Found Creativity

 Well I certainly had no intention of taking the entire month of September "off!"  My weekly writing time for it came and went throughout the month, but to be honest I did not make any effort to catch up. I certainly was busy, but it seems like it was a lost month anyway. I was traveling, sorting, purging, starting school, down sick, in a mess, but here's the oddest thing: I lost my creativity at the end of August. 

By "lost" I mean gone, zero, finished, through. I felt like shutting down all writing/publishing/blogging projects, selling my craft supplies and burning my sewing patterns. It was different than just losing your inspiration or looking at your hobby and wondering what to do. It was different from saying "I'm taking a break because I don't have time." It was something in me definitely saying "It's Over, Forever." I felt no obligation to continue anything.

I argued with myself-- don't get rid of it all just yet! Wait and see if something comes back. Think of the money you will have to spend if you suddenly decide to create again. Don't shut your projects down, you may yet write. So I did not act on it, but it was a "for certain" feeling.

I don't know what happened that Creativity just up and walked out on me. It has been years since I have sewn anyway, maybe I was tired of keeping the stuff. I was very much into my papercraft but that sort of ended this summer and I lacked time. This blog can become daunting because of the enormity of the photos I am sorting through for it, it is easy to be de-motivated. I was doing a lot of sorting of items that had been in boxes for years, maybe it was decluttering overwhelm. I had just finished a 3-year writing project, maybe it was goal-achievement exhuastion. One of my children was on a trip that we were all very excited about, but maybe with the extra person gone it affected my brain! Whatever it was, there was a part of me that kept checking with the other part: anything sparking yet?

I was a bit disturbed, because I have been writing and crafting constantly since I was seven years old. It is so much a part of my life, even when I can't do it, my creative mind does not shut down. I dare not even think of something creative (whether writing or hand-work) at bed-time because it will prevent sleep!Yes, I have seen hobbies come and go and let go of supplies. I have had to put things aside as I had no time, but never forever. And there was always writing. So you see how I was looking at myself wondering what happened?

It was three weeks later that some little inklings of inspiration started to sparkle. Why? I do not know. Traveling was over, I had found a bunch of sewing supplies in the declutter that I had been missing for years, it was mid-September, we were back on a school routine. Whatever it was, the sparks became more frequent but it took another couple of weeks for buckle-down motivation to follow. I hope today to get a few posts scheduled and get back on track here!

I want to know: Has this ever happened to you?


JulyGulf said...

Glad to see the update. I know you are doing this not just for the readers of your blog but a type of family history. Sometimes you just have to push through unless of course there are extenuating circumstances. Looking forward to seeing more progress on the house. Happy Fall Yall!!

Christine said...

YES!!!!! It has happened to me. Gone, the spark to be creative! But like you, I waited and waited and waited. I stopped sewing, journaling, cooking and blogging.
Then slowly be surely, most creative outlets came back. The one that hasn't returned is cooking. I just don't want to be creative in the kitchen.
Blogging has been a fun and creative outlet for me. I like that it involes writing and photography. Two personnal ways to created.
I would suggest that you take one creative subject one at a time, to work on. Go slowly and some might come back or new ones might develope! I personally, would be sad to see you leave blogging.

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